Marriage A to Z: Are You Thankful?

Gratitude

What?
Definition:
Appreciate the value of, be grateful for, thankful, see the need for
Mindset, attitude, 
It’s an attitude, but it also involves actions.
Gratitude for and to person and toward God (to God)
Paul says, “Be thankful.” It’s a choice, just like complaining is. Feelings are there, but you can choose it. Thankfulness is not only an emotion.

Why?
It affects your outlook on life – in midst of trials (better able to endure)
It affects relationships. If you’re thankful for the person, it places the focus on positive things, rather than the things you’re NOT thankful for!

Filter – Look at a person, look at them through a filter of gratefulness.
 When dating, it comes more naturally to do this! But over the years, our “lens” gets clogged!

We tend toward complaining, griping, and negative thoughts about everything! Our flesh has this tendency.. and we make things all about ourselves. Thankfulness puts someone else in the spotlight.

 

How to?
Paul says, “Be thankful.” It’s a choice, just like complaining is. Feelings are there, but you can choose it. Thankfulness is not only an emotion.

With God, dwell on who God is – His attributes and character. Consider what you know about Him, and be thankful for the fact that He is that way.

Make a list of what you’re thankful for regarding your spouse.

Many of the negative things you struggle with your spouse, see the good side of those things. For example, a strong-willed person can cause problems, but in the right setting, this type of person is invaluable! Pray that spouse will use his strengths for God.

See the potential in your spouse. What God can do in and through him/her.

Remember all the little things spouse does to benefit you. It’s easy to overlook little things – laundry, car upkeep, taking out the trash, vacuuming, paying bills.

Choosing thankfulness for spouse inserts a buffer for when times are tough.

Focus on Scripture – see how God has blessed you. 
If you’re overall thankful, it’ll be easier to be thankful for specifics.

Beware of things that seek to steal your gratefulness – friends who complain about spouse, inward focus on your needs and desires, putting others before yourself, remembering this life is short.

Summary:
Ultimately, gratitude is about YOU, not the situation or relationships around you. It’s your choice!